Greek Fragment #6
Posted: January 27, 2012 Filed under: Greek Fragment Leave a comment »From a series of Greek fragments from the 7th century BCE.
Is Aphron’s mother a whore?
Indeed, he’s the only one
to ever come out of her.
Ecce Sandwich!
Posted: January 27, 2012 Filed under: Other | Tags: sandwich Leave a comment »Among my greater talents is the ability to will a sandwich into existence. Sometimes, at work, I find myself hungry and craving that most wondrous creation: the sandwich. Not a half hour later, I’ll be passing down the hallway and espy, in a conference room, a plate of sandwiches! Not just one—a catered platter with assorted breads and variety of sandwich meats.
Ecce Sandwich!
Greek Fragment #5
Posted: January 27, 2012 Filed under: Greek Fragment Leave a comment »From a series of Greek fragments from the 7th century BCE.
Did I stab Aphron in the back?
Yes, but I was forced to:
the man was entirely ass.
UPDATE: Dr. Who’s New Office Hours
Posted: January 27, 2012 Filed under: Other | Tags: dr. who, gallifrey Leave a comment »London, September 22, 1672, 8am-10am
Gallifrey, January 14, 3034, 2pm-4pm
Lisbon, June 23, 1956, 12pm-2pm
From a Student, Upon Learning the Assignment for Class Entailed Reading
Posted: January 26, 2012 Filed under: Other Leave a comment »“Word.”
Exercise in Entendre: Mind-Blowing
Posted: January 26, 2012 Filed under: Enthusiasms Leave a comment »How many entendres are present in the following utterance?
To wit: “This mind isn’t going to blow itself.”
An Unsuccessful Pick-Up Line (II)
Posted: January 26, 2012 Filed under: Other | Tags: martini, pick-up line Leave a comment »One might envision a romance of passion and adventure, but the truth is more boring: bright lights dim, bold colors run, and fireworks fall to earth partially exploded, their ashes commingling with puddle water into a black and stinky paste. Our surfaces might, at first, excite, but after initial congress, prolonged examination and company, excitement withers. It’s cold outside. Martini?
A Conversation that Leaves One at Relationship Equilibrium with a Well-Educated Woman.
Posted: January 25, 2012 Filed under: Other Leave a comment »Him: What are you doing Saturday?
Her: Not sure
Him: Do you want to go our local natural history museum? There’s a new exhibit featuring Panna Cotta Warriors!
Rational Responses to Charles Baudelaire
Posted: January 25, 2012 Filed under: Aphorisms Leave a comment »Charles Baudelaire: “You have to be always drunk. That’s all there is to it—it’s the only way. So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks your back and bends you to the earth, you have to be continually drunk.”
Rational Response: “Okay.”
Sir Mix-A-Lot Lyric, Revised to Enthuse about Greens
Posted: January 25, 2012 Filed under: Enthusiasms | Tags: bok choy, sir mix-a-lot Leave a comment »“Baby got bok choy!”
McSweeney
Carson Cistulli
Dan Woytek
daynperry
Najib
Sean Casey
