Selected Aphorisms #14

The fourteenth installment in our eye-popping new series.

I get embarrassed when total strangers approach me on the street just to say thanks or when adoring undergraduates show up in droves to hear me read from my oeuvre or when critics refer to me off-handedly as the greatest mind of my generation. Enough of that, people, it’s unnecessary. I’m a normal guy and I do all the things that normal guys do. All of them, with one exception, that is: when I get dressed in the morning, I actually don’t put my pants on one leg at a time.