Most Awesome Thing About Being a Cat

You get to have breakfast for dinner every day.


Sensible Winter Cocktail

I Can’t Believe It’s Not Hot Buttered Rum


Quick and Easy Five-Minute Meal

Cream of Soup Soup


Lost Excerpt from Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

Women judge a person by their shoes, men judge a person by how they pronounce gyro.


Dessert Item that Sounds Far Less Exciting when Translated into Plain English

Three Milks Cake


Three People I’ll Likely Never Meet

Bjorn Borg

Elisabeth Shue

An actual person who prefers Wheat Chex over Rice or Corn

 


Las Vegas’ Most Delicious New Hotel & Casino

Little Caesars Palace


Advanced Super Bowl Statistics

Hot wings consumed before the blackout
Woytek: 23
Lurie: 17

Bathroom time of possession after the blackout
Woytek: 46 minutes
Lurie: 32 minutes


Top 5 Failed Air Freshener Scents

5. Yellow Corn Tortilla

4. Bag of Hockey Equipment

3. Store-Bought Rotisserie Chicken in Back of Fridge

2. Bubblegum

1. Microwaved Salmon


Best Way to Sign a Cover Letter When Applying for a Job at a Casual Workplace

Forever in blue jeans


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 59 other followers